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Crash Course

Thursday, February 19, 2009
RALPH dipsticks get fast and foolish in raging rally cars.

Racer profiles
Josh McEvoy

Car: 2004 Mitsubishi Evo 8
Nickname: Maverick
Strength: Going really fast

Bryan Cook
Car:
2004 Subaru WRX STI
Nickname: Peter Crock
Strength: Making tasty lunches

Rob Badman
Car:
Ford Falcon XR8 Ute
Nickname: Wheezer
Strength: Grammar

Dan Steiner Car: 1996 Suzuki Swift Cino (his own)
Nickname: Pokie
Strength: Not wearing pants
After checking out ace car flick Death Race, the RALPH crew decided to do our own death race – preferably without the death bit.

Unfortunately, we couldn't find any jet-powered muscle cars with roof-mounted flamethrowers, so we settled for the next best thing – the beaut Sideways Action rally driving experience.

Maverick was star of the dusty track from the outset. Like Mark Webber, except successful, he had the other blokes eating dirt early. This was an issue for Wheezer, whose asthma kicked in after inhaling several mouthfuls of dust and was forced to pull over for a nap.

Just when Crock was beginning to find his feet, he realised it was lunchtime and jumped out of the car to tuck into the gourmet sandwich he brought from home. Meanwhile, Pokie was distracted by what he thought was a casino on the horizon and span out into a ditch.

After a small clean-up operation (Pokie soiled his pants a little), Sideways Action capped off the day with the presentation of prestigious certificates perfect for framing or wrapping fish.

Do you think rally car driving would be tough? Enter your comments below.

User comments
Rally drivers are the best drivers ever. Better than any formula, category or GT series. No one, and I mean NO ONE, can do +200kmh in dirt, snow or whatever, sideways and with perfect control. Screw it up, and there's plenty of trees to make your life short. No formula 1 driver is as good as a multiple world champion rally driver. Like, how easy (relatively) would it be when you have aero aids, slicks, a nice smooth race track and no gravel? Rally drivers do almost the sames speeds but with all the variations of nature.... They are the best.

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